


Ghost of Fanboys Past

by MiniRaven



Category: Captain America (Movies), Captain America - All Media Types, Iron Man (Movies), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff, James "Rhodey" Rhodes is a Good Bro, Kid Fic, Kid Tony Stark, M/M, POV Alternating, POV Steve Rogers, POV Tony Stark, Panic Attacks, Past Torture, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Protective James "Rhodey" Rhodes, Time Travel, Tony Stark Has Issues, Tony Stark Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-24
Updated: 2017-12-24
Packaged: 2019-02-18 23:21:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,960
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13110654
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MiniRaven/pseuds/MiniRaven
Summary: As a kid, Tony practically worshiped Captain America. He read every comic book, treasured every poster, every playing card. To say he was obsessed would be an understatement. Thank goodness Tony's early fanboy days were far behind him.Or, at least, they would be if AIM hadn't kidnapped Tony, reached into his time stream, and pulled out the six year old version of him who was absolutely smitten with Captain America.Or, as Tony liked to call it, Tuesday.After being rescued by the newly reformed Avengers, Tony realizes he's got a lot on his plate. Not only does he have to figure out how to send said kid back to the past, but he also has to deal with his teammate's strange infatuation with his younger self. Specifically tell his new boyfriend, Steve Rogers, that this kid is not adorable. You should not listen to him. You should not encourage him. Why do you let him say all these embarrassing things. Child, stop. You're embarrassing me. No, don't do that. Stop. Please stop. For the love of god, someone please shut him up!





	Ghost of Fanboys Past

**Author's Note:**

  * For [thudworm](https://archiveofourown.org/users/thudworm/gifts).



> My Holiday Exchange gift for thudworm. I went with one of their long prompts.
> 
> Prompt: A young version of Tony (~6-8 years old) is somehow brought forward in time to the present day. Everyone (especially Steve) thinks young!Tony is the most adorable thing ever, except for adult!Tony who finds the experience mortifying. Particularly when his younger self won't shut up about his hero worship of Captain America.
> 
> Tried to fit in Avengers as a family and Rhodey. It came out okay?
> 
> Trigger Warning: Tony starts having a panic attack when he recalls AIM kidnapping him and the 10 Rings torturing him. It's short, but it's there. Start reading here : “-ony? What’s –ong? –ony? –ony!”

When Tony finally came around, the first thing he thought was, “Everything hurts.” Every cell in his body felt like it had its own heartbeat. A constant, pulsing ache that stemmed from the marrow of his bones. He felt like a battery, slowly being drained of its power. Like something, not even a big something, was siphoning the life out of his body and transferring it to something else. Something small. Something close?

Slowly, Tony opened his eyes. There was a metal ceiling above his head. He could feel quite thrum of a large engine under his fingers. Tony tried to move his arms, but he was strapped down. Go figure. The air smelled stale. Recycled. But there was a warmth in this place that quelled his panic. A tinted window on his left and something blond and familiar on his right.

Tony rolled over as much as the cot would allow so he could get a better look at his boyfriend. Steve sat on the other side of the small plane, running a still gloved hand through a mop of brown hair. A scrawny boy no older than seven slept soundly in Steve’s lap.

“Hey,” Tony said, his voice crackling like an old radio.

Steve smiled back at him. “Hey,” he said. “How you feeling?”

“Horrible. I got kidnapped, throw in a room full of scientists with the creativity of a pigeon, and used as a guinea pig for one of AIM’s crazy experiments all in less than twenty-four hours,” said Tony, trying his best to look as distraught as possible. “Feel sorry for me, Steve. Why aren't you over here pampering me? I need kisses to make me feel better.”

Steve chuckled at Tony's plead, but he didn't move. “Can’t. This little guy climbed into my lap and refuses to let go.”

Tony suppressed an exasperated groan. Oh, for the love of- “He’s not a cat, Steve. Push him of and get over here. He’ll be fine.”

Steve, to Tony’s surprise, looked scandalized at the suggestion. “I can’t do that to him.”

“Why not? He’s just a kid. You don’t even know him.”

“Of course I do,” said Steve. “I mean, I didn’t recognize him at first, but I know him.”

That only made Tony’s confusion worse. “How? Accidental baby from a night gone wrong? Badly made clone? Wait, don’t tell me. He’s Clint’s clone.”

“Tony,” Steve said, “He’s you.”

Tony’s smile faltered. A cold panic welled up inside him.

“The experiment AIM performed on you, we think it worked. Bruce is looking over the data they recorded. It’s not complete, but he’s inclined to believe this little guy, he’s you.”

No way. That was impossible. AIM was just trying to scare him when they said they could reach into Tony's time stream and manipulate important things from his past, right? He had seen their notes on the blackboard. The numbers and math were all wrong. Most of the formulas they used were theoretical and the results made absolutely no sense. The tech they were using was ten years old and smoked like a garbage fire. They still had that obnoxious dial-up sound playing over the loudspeaker.

But that band of hard light they had extracted from Tony's body, the feeling of his very existence being twisted and broken when gloved hands burrowed into the beam; that felt too real. Tony had felt fingers moving under his skin, making him and unmaking him in whatever way they pleased. The heat was unbearable. He could have burned alive if he wasn’t submerged in water.

Water. A tank of cold water. Immersed, trapped, and completely helpless. Strapped down with leather cuffs on a metal operating table. They said the tank was filled with liquid air and not water, but Tony was too busy having a panic attack to notice. An expected symptom of his PTSD. AIM really should know better. But maybe they wanted that. Maybe they wanted him to suffer. Remind Tony of the days when he was tortured by the Ten Rings. Shoving his head into a bucket of water over and over and over and over and over and over and over and-

“-ony? What’s –ong? –ony? –ony!” Fingers touched the back of his hand. Tony flinched.

‘AIM. The Ten Rings. Pain.’ The memory consumed his senses, but Tony didn’t pull away from the touch of fingers on skin.

Warm. That feeling slowly sunk down into the darkness of his psyche. The person touching his was warm. They weren’t AIM’s cold, rubber fingers brandishing their claim across his skin. It wasn’t the dry, rough hands of a working man caked in desert sand. This person was warm, and familiar, and...

“Tony, babe,” Steve said, his voice slowly breaking through the haze. “It’s okay. You’re safe. I’m here. He’s safe. We’re safe. Everything’s going to work out.”

Tony's gaze turned toward Steve. He gulped down the recycled air and  wrapped his fingers around the hand. “Yeah,” Tony rasped. It still hurt to breath, but Steve was here. He was safe. They could work through this, together. “Yeah, of course it will.”

“Tony!” yelled Rhodey as he clomped out of the cockpit, still clad in his War Machine suit. He saw Steve holding Tony’s hand and glared at the man. “What’s going on back here?”

“It’s fine, honeybunch. Just a little bit of a scare,” Tony said. He felt a little breathless, but gave a weak smile and tried to play it off for laughs. From the look on Rhodey’s frown, he clearly wasn’t buying it.

“Panic attack,” Steve explained. He gave Tony’s hand a gentle squeeze. “It’s over for now, but he’s still a little shaky.”

Rhodey glared at Steve. “You know I still don’t trust you, right? After all the bullshit you pulled with the Accords, I don’t trust you to take care of either of them.”

A look of regret flashed across Steve’s face. “I know.”

“And if I had it my way, that kid would be riding shotgun with me up in the fort.”

“But he didn’t choose to go with you,” Steve shot back. “He choose to stay back with me.”

“And you have no idea how much I wish I could knock some sense into him,” muttered Rhodey in a voice that implied he wasn’t just worried about the younger Tony Stark’s life choices.

His eyes drifted to Tony, eyeing him up and down for any sign of distress. “You sure you’re okay? Any health problems? Bruce’s not sure of the details, but he said to be on the lookout for nausea or stuff like that.”

“Nope. I’m just fine back here,” Tony said.

Rhodey didn’t look happy with that answer, but this wasn’t his choice. It was Tony’s. Just like it was Tony's choice to date Steve. “Well, if you do feel anything, let us know. Natasha is driving. Bruce is trying to sift through the data we salvaged. Bucky would help but he’s, well, Bucky. Clint might know what to do if the kid wakes up. He’s the only one with parenting experience.”

“Why do you guys always pick me to help with the kid?” Clint yelled from the front. “He won’t let anyone handle him besides Steve. Let him take care of the kid.”

“Would you keep it down,” hissed Rhodey. “Kid’s asleep. Do you remember how long it took before Steve finally got him to shut up?”

At that exact moment, because the universe hated Tony with a passion, a sleepy yawn came from the other side of the plane. Tony’s eyes went right to the child as he stretched across the long seat like a cat.

“Cap? Where’d you go?”

“Hey, kid,” said Steve. He walked back over to the other side of the plane and ran a calming hand through the wild mess of brown hair. “Did you sleep well?”

“Um hum,” the kid hummed with a content smile. “I dreamt that there was a dragon outside my house. Everything was on fire and I was really scared, but you came in and saved me.”

“Oh really,” said Steve, looking over at Tony with a look that said, ‘Isn’t he precious?’

“Mu hum.” The kid opened his large, brown eyes and looked up at Steve with deep reverence. “And then you punched daddy in the face and I go to ride on your motorcycle all the way down to the beach. And then you took me out for ice cream. And then Disneyland. And then, and then, you said we could have a sleepover and stay up until midnight. And then we did. And it was great. And-”

Okay. That’s all Tony need to hear to confirm that this random kid was a younger version of him. Tony had forgotten how big a fan of Captain America he was back in the day. “Fascinating story kid, but how about we save it for another day.”

The kid’s eyes snapped over to Tony. The joy drained from his face. “Daddy?”

Tony tried to push himself up, but his arms flailed about like overcooked noodles. “Shit. What’s wrong with me? I should be able to do this.”

“Tony, babe you need to rest. You’ve been through a lot today,” said Steve.

“Been through worse,” Tony grunted. His arms felt like they were going to fall off any second. They wobbled under his weight, but somehow Tony managed to push himself into a sitting position.

Steve was by his side within seconds. His hands clasped Tony’s shoulders and he tried to stabilize the man. “You shouldn’t be pushing yourself. We have no idea what AIM did to you.”

“And I’m telling you, I’m fine,” Tony snapped, knocking away Steve’s hand. “Feels like a bit of my soul has been ripped out, but that’s nothing compared to having a battery up to my chest.”

Steve groaned. “Tony, we talked about this. Just because you’ve been through worse doesn’t excuse what you’re going through now.”

“And I’m telling you it’s not an excuse. I’m fine.”

“No, you’re not,” said Steve, his patience for Tony’s stubbornness running out fast. “You can barely hold yourself up.”

“I’m a grown ass man, Steve. I can do whatever the hell I want.”

“Tony,” Steve growled. “Don’t make me order you to stay in bed.”

Tony laughed. “I’d like to see you try, kettle.”

“Tony.”

“What? Can’t take a joke, old man?”

“This isn’t funny!”

“Hey, bricks for brains!”

Steve and Tony glared at Rhodey. “What!” they yelled.

Rhodey pointed to the other side of the plane. The seat younger Tony occupied was now empty. “Tony’s gone. He ran off while you two were yelling your heads off.”

Tony muttered a curse under his breath. “So much for first impressions.”

“That doesn’t make sense,” said Steve. “We were just arguing. Why would he-”

“Dad,” said Tony. “Short answer to a lot of my problems.”

Rhodey nodded. “He thinks you’re Howard.”

“Why would he think that?”

“I was yelling,” Tony said with a weak shrug. “Dad yelled a lot when I was young. Kid probably thinks I look like him too. Don’t ask me how. I don’t remember what Howard looked like when I was that age, but kid can generalize stuff. Wouldn’t be surprised if he saw the family resemblance.”

“Okay, new plan,” said Steve as he thought aloud. “Tony, you stay here. I’ll look for him. Rhodey, tell Bruce to come back here and check to make sure Tony is okay. I’m still a bit worried about him.”

“Which one?”

“You,” Steve said, pointing a finger in Tony’s direction. “Rhodey, make sure he doesn’t move.”

“Can I sit on him?”

Tony glared at Rhodey. “I will literally rip your legs off if you do that.”

Rhodey laughed. “Gotta catch me first. I’m fast as lighting now.”

* * *

 

As Steve made his way to the back of the quinjet, he tried to focus on finding the younger Tony and not dwell on Colonel Rhodes’ behavior. Rhodey was Tony’s friend. His oldest friend. It wasn’t surprising he’d be protective of Tony. Given Steve’s behavior over the Accords, his recent reconciliation with the Avengers, and the latest development in Steve and Tony’s relationship (them now dating), Steve expected a few extra shovel talks in the future. There were only a few people Tony trusted and despite being his boyfriend, Steve didn’t think he ranked up very high on that list anymore.

Steve ducked under a few low hanging beams and carefully began his inspection of the cargo bay. It was the only place Tony could have snuck away to without running into anybody.

Storage boxes lined the small section separating the cargo from its passengers. Supplies leftover from the mission were thrown on the floor in disarray. There were only so many places to hide a small boy, and thankfully, the younger Tony had picked a very easy to find spot. Curled up in a ball behind supply crates may not be the most original, but it certainly made Steve’s job easier.

“Hey,” said Steve. He kept his voice and steps quiet as he walked up to the boy. “Everything okay?”

“Go away,” Tony said into his arms. He squeezed his legs closer to his chest, trying to make himself smaller.

“Hey, it’s okay. It’s just me. You want to talk about it?” Steve asked as he knelt down.

Tony didn’t move. Steve could almost see the ‘processing’ bar above his head. Tony peeked out from between his arms and looked at Steve. There was a bit of hesitation in Tony’s eyes, but as soon as Steve spotted it, Tony buried his head back down between his arms and shook his head.

“You sure?” asked Steve. He didn’t want to push too much, but it really looked like there was something important on the boy’s mind. Something must be holding him back.

“I won’t tell,” offered Steve.

Tony lifted his head out of his arms just enough so their eyes could meet. “Promise?”

Steve nodded. “Promise.”

Tony jumped out of his hiding spot and into Steve’s arms. Tony wrapped his small arms around Steve’s neck latching on like a leech. “I didn’t mean to,” he cried into Steve’s shoulder. His entire body was shaking. “I know I’m a big boy and I’m supposed to sleep all by myself, but I forgot. Everything’s so different and scary. First there were those guys in yellow hazmat suits. And they kept poking and prodding me and asking me questions. And I was so scared. And I didn’t know what to do. And then you came. And I… I… Please don’t let him hurt me.”

Steve arms wrapped around the boy. “What are you… Are you talking about your older self?”

“No,” Tony said between violent hiccups. “Daddy.”

Steve’s mouth fell slack as he searched for the right words. “Tony’s not… That’s not…” Tony had just let out a waterfall of emotion and there was too much to unpack at once. Dammit Howard. How could you do this to your own son?

Steve knew Tony didn’t have a great childhood. He had held Tony through enough screaming nightmares to know their relationship wasn’t ideal. But the way younger Tony was crying, Steve never realized how bad it really was. He knew some of the facts. But being told about it from Tony’s removed, adult perspective was one thing. Seeing how younger Tony reacted to a very current problem was something else.

“Hey, it’s okay.” Steve said, placing a reassuring hand on Tony’s shaking shoulder. He smiled and kept his voice as low and as comforting as possible. “Maybe you won’t understand this yet, but he’s not Howard, Tony. He’s you. An older version of you, but he’s still you. You don’t need to be afraid.”

Tony looked up at Steve through the tears and a nose full of snot. “Really? He doesn’t look like me. I don’t have a beard.”

Steve gave Tony a reassuring smile. “Things change when you get older. People get taller. Some get a few wrinkles. You grew a beard. Would Captain America lie to you?”

Tony rubbed his nose and sniffed. “No,” he said. Tony hiccupped a few times as he attempted to control his emotions. His shaking hands calmed down to a small, almost unnoticeable tremble.

“You want to say hi?” asked Steve.

Tony nervously bit down on his lower lip. His eyes flickered over Steve’s shoulder to catch a glimpse at his older self, and then back to the ground. His feet were fidgeting a bit and there was a tiny sparkle of curiosity in his eyes, but he held onto Steve’s hand like a lifeline. “No,” he said.

Steve squeezed Tony’s hand. “I’ll be there for you every step of the way,” he said, pushing a stray hair out of Tony’s face. “Would that make you feel better?”

Tony frowned as he mulled it over. He didn’t look happy. But when Tony finally looked up and locked eyes with Steve, his face was filled with determination. He wrapped his legs around Steve’s waist (they only went halfway around, he was so petite) and whispered into Steve’s ear. “Promise me you won’t let me go, okay?”

Steve smiled. He wrapped his arms around Tony’s small body and picked him up. “Okay.”

* * *

 

The press of Bruce’s fingers felt good on Tony’s skin. He’d rather have Steve take his pulse, but Bruce was good too. Anything was good if it gave him a clean bill of health.

“Heartbeat’s a little fast, but considering all the coffee you drink that’s not unusual,” said Bruce, looking up from his watch.

“Other than that, right as rain, right?” Tony asked as he swung his legs back and forth under the cot.

Bruce shrugged. “Won’t know for sure until we get back to the compound and I can run some actual tests. But for now, yes. Looks like you’ll live for now.”

“Good enough for me.”

“Just make sure you limit past you’s exposure to future technology. And don’t touch your younger self,” warned Bruce. “We don’t know the effects of AIM’s experiment yet. Will you fade because of the paradox? Are we in a stable time loop? Did the timeline break when he came here? The universe as we know it isn’t falling apart. Seems to be fine when he interacts with people or things. However, we don’t know if the knowledge he’ll take back will change things or what will if you guys interact with each other. Talking seems safe, but if you guys touch for more than a few seconds it could cause a time paradox.”

“So, no telling him too much about the future and touching or else the world implodes. Easy,” said Tony. Even a genius like him could remember something that simple. No touching. No talking about future tech. No filling him on how much their dad was an ass and he shouldn’t listen to a word he says. No words of encouragement. No bragging about his accomplishments and how Tony surpassed their father in every way.

No talking about how his feelings for Kevin should have set off some alarms that he wasn’t straight. No advice about how he should have accepted his sexuality years ago instead of repressing it well into adulthood. No words of warning about how Steve’s voice made his heart melt and how Tony had used it as an excuse for so many things. No talking about his falling out and reconciliation with Steve. No details about his now very full life with Steve. Not a word about their relationship.

Well, that last one might be a bit difficult to hide, but he could do it.

“We’re back,” said Steve as he walked back into the passenger bay. The kid was wrapped around his waist like a koala clinging to a eucalyptus tree. Tony definitely did _not_ feel a pang of jealousy as they walked in.

“He’s a little shy, so be nice,” Steve warned. He tapped the kid on the shoulder. “Hey. Say hi to everyone.”

The kid peeked out from his hiding place allowing Tony to finally get a good look at the kid. The eyes were a recognizable shade of brown. They were filled with anxiety, but there a glint of curiosity that was all too familiar. The kid’s mouth was familiar. A bit too wide for his face, but that was to be expected. Tony always thoughts his lips were too big in his baby pictures. Add a wig and some rouge and he’d look like a petulant little girl. At least, that’s what Tony thought every time he and Steve looked through Tony’s family album.

The kid’s mouth twisted into a deep frown as he inspected the adult man in front of him. “You’re old,” he said.

Tony sighed. A child with absolutely no tact. Yup, that was probably him. Or maybe that was children in general. Well, there was more than one way to find out. “What can I say kid, mid-forties will do that for you.”

“You look like dad.”

Tony grimaced at the answer. “We have dad’s genetics. What else am I supposed to look like?”

“I wanted to grow up to look like Captain America. You look nothing like him.”

Rhodey winced. “Kid you is harsh, Tones.”

Steve looked at the kid and smiled. “I don’t know. I think that’s adorable.”

“You really shouldn’t,” Tony grumbled. “Look, kid, hate to tell you this, but we’re not going to grow up to be Captain America. We got what we got and I just made do. There’s no way I could ever be like Cap.”

Short stuff wasn’t convinced. “But I was training really hard! What about running around the house six times? And our weights? What happened to them?”

“First of all,” Tony said, because he had to set the record straight, “they’re not weights. They’re just empty boxes of oatmeal. Second, Steve stop smiling.”

Steve bit down on his lip, but he couldn’t stop a delighted squeak from leaking out. “You made weights so you could be like me?”

“Jarvis made them, now shut up. Third, we gave that up in about two months.”

“Nooooooo, you’re lying,” the kid whined. “Jarvis got me stickers of Cap’s shield as a reward and everything.”

Rhodey stared at Tony, mouth agape. “Wow. I remember you had a couple posters in college, but this is something else. You weren’t kidding when you said you were obsessed with Captain America as a kid. I thought it only went as far as the custom-made costume.”

“Okay, both of you need to shut up right now,” said Tony. This was quickly getting out of hand.

“Cap,” Tony wailed. “Big me is being mean!”

“I am not!”

“That’s enough. You two need to settle down right now!” Steve boomed. “Bruce,” said Steve, trying to get them back on track. “Care to update us on our situation? Have you figured out a way to get this little guy back yet?” asked Steve, shifting Tony up and out of sight of his elder counterpart.

Tony puffed up his cheeks. “I told you, I’m not little. I’m six and a quarter years old.”

Bruce let out a heavy sigh. “Unfortunately, no. I’d like our Tony here to check the figures, but from what I can tell, AIM just threw a bunch of equations against a blackboard, said it was good enough to manipulate time, patched together a machine with computer parts from the eighties, and successfully pulled this kid out of Tony’s time stream. I don’t think we could replicate the experiment even if we tried.

“We salvaged some of their equipment, but it’s fried to bits. It’ll take hours just to piece together the details of how they did it.”

“But how long before you can send him back home?” asked Steve.

Bruce looked over at the older Tony. He played with his glasses as he tried to come up with a solid answer. “Weeks if we’re lucky. More likely months if not a year. We don’t want to cause a paradox.”

Tony’s stomach dropped. “You’ve got to be kidding me. Two of the brightest minds in the universe, and you don’t think we can’t figure out time travel in less than a year?”

“It’s complicated stuff, Tony. Steve Hawking wrote a whole thesis paper about how time travel is impossible.”

“Funny. I had impossible for breakfast this morning. You know what it tasted like? Not this!”

Steve let out a heavy sigh. “Looks like you’re stuck with us for a while, kid.”

The kid could barely contain his disappointment. “Hurray! I mean, aw are you serious? Whatever will I do now?” he asked, cuddling up against Steve’s side.

Rhodey snorted. “Your sarcasm isn’t lost on any of us, kid.”

“No really. I’m super disappointed. Look!” Tony pinched his arm. It took him a couple of times before a glassy sheen covered his eye. “See? I’m crying. I’m super sad.”

“I’ll bet,” Rhodey said with an endearing grin. “It must be so hard knowing you might have to spend a few weeks or even months stuck with your hero.”

“It is,” Tony said, trying to look as upset as possible. “I finally get to spend time with Captain America and all I have to wear is this silly medical shirt.

“Well, in that case, why don’t we stop by Macy’s before we head home,” Steve suggested. “Get you some real clothes that fit. Don’t want you feeling uncomfortable during your stay.”

Tony’s eyes lit up. “Are you going to pick out my clothes for me?”

The question caught Steve off guard. Him pick out Tony’s clothes? “I mean,” said Steve, a little lost for words. “I can if you want.”

“Don’t do it kid. His taste in fashion is atrocious. He has enough plaid shirts to clothe an lesbian bar,” warned Tony.

“That’s okay,” said the kid as he wrapped his arms around Steve’s neck. “I’m sure I’ll like anything you pick out.”

“Oh my god,” groaned Rhodey. “The hero worship is strong with this one.”

* * *

 

“What do you think?” asked Tony as he stepped out of the Macy’s changing room. He did a little twirl to show off his light-up shoes and blue shirt. An ironed-on copy of Captain America’s shield was sewn into the center of the t-shirt. Tony puffed his chest, trying to make the red, white, and blue symbol seem bigger than it already was.

“I think you should take it off,” said Tony, pointedly avoiding looking at his younger counterpart.

The younger Tony rolled his eyes. “I wasn’t asking you. I was asking Cap.”

Steve was sitting on a stool across the dressing room door. A soft smile spread across his face as Tony strutted down an invisible runway. “I think it looks good on you,” he said. Because, of course, Steve loved everything the kid did.

“See. Cap likes it,” Tony said with the smuggest smile possible.

Tony rolled his eyes. “Cap is a lying liar.”

“No he isn’t. Captain America never lies,” the kid said, stomping his foot on the floor.

Tony snorted. Oh the wisdom that came with age. “I bet he never swears or poops either.”

Tony covered his mouth as he gasped. “You don’t poop?”

Steve didn’t find it as funny as Tony. “Cut it out,” he said, gently cuffing Tony upside the head. “Don’t go putting crazy thoughts in his head.”

“But you do poop, right?” Tony asked as he leaned over and whispered into Steve’s ear. “If you didn’t, what would happen to all that food you eat?”

“That’s enough of out you. It’s getting late and the store’s about to close. Go get changed,” Tony said, shooing the kid back into the dressing room.

The kid stuck out his tongue, but did what he was told.

“Hey Tony,” yelled Clint as he popped by the dressing room. “Guess what I found for squirt.”

Steve squinted his eyes. “Is that…”

Tony took one look at the item in Clint’s hands and knew exactly where the conversation was going. “No.”

“Come on,” insisted Clint. “It’s perfect. Give him something to cling to so you can get your boyfriend back.”

“We are not giving him a Captain America doll.”

“A what?” The door to the changing room opened with a bang.

“Hey kid, think fast!” yelled Clint as he threw the doll like a football right into the kid’s hands.

The kid’s jaw dropped.  “Is this…”

Clint nodded. “One hundred percent cotton Captain America plush. Made right here in the gold old US of A. No chop action, but it’s soft as fuck.”

Tony, still speechless, squeezed the doll between the fingers. The doll bend in half but never lost his confident, sewed on smile. He gingerly ran his fingers along every seam, from the top of Cap’s cowl to the bottom of his red boots. When he was done, Tony looked up at Clint. “I love it,” he whispered.

Clint beamed with pride. “See, he loves it. We should get it for him.”

“Absolutely not,” snapped Tony. “We’re putting that thing right back where we found it. Give it here, kid.”

“No!” Tony yelled. He held the doll close to his chest. “I want it.”

“I told you, you can’t have it. Now, hand it over,” said Tony, holding back on the building frustration.

“You can’t make me. I won’t let you take Cap away from me!” screamed Tony.

“You little-” Tony growled as the kid ran behind Steve’s seat.

“Bruce said we can’t touch or else the world will explode,” the kid said, peeking out from behind Steve’s back. “If you try to take Cap away from me, I’ll… I’ll…”

Tony just laughed. “You’ll do what? Destroy the world and take Captain America with you. Real smart plan, kid. Dad would love this suicide mission.”

Steve glared at the man. “Tony, just let him have the doll.”

“Wait, did you just… Of course you did,” Tony said with a sour laugh. “Because you’ve decided to side with him from now on instead of your injured boyfri- You know what, don’t worry about it. I get it. He’s cute. Hard to say no to a face like that.”

“Tony, I’m not siding with anybody.”

“Keep telling yourself that,” Tony said with a disgusted smirk. “Who knows? Someday you might be a better liar than Loki.”

Steve stood up. “What is wrong with you? Why are you making such a big deal out of this?”

“I am not making a big deal out of this!”

“Yes, you really are!”

“Hey. Hey! Knock it off you two” Rhodey said, stepping in between the two men like a teacher breaking a fight between his students. “You’re scaring the kid again.”

“I am not! I’m wasn’t that sensitive as a kid.”

Rhodey pointed to a dark shadow behind Steve. Sure enough, the young boy was cowering behind Steve’s legs like a caged rat. He held onto the doll with both hands, pinning it to his chest like a cross to ward off evil.

“Okay, maybe I was being a bit loud,” Tony amended.

Rhodey gave Tony a pointed look, but said nothing. He crouched down onto his knees until he was about the same height as the kid. “You found what you wanted, right? How about we check out and give these two a minute to get their heads on straight. That sound good to you?”

The kid bit his lip. He nervously shot a glance up to Steve and Tony. When neither of them moved, he ran into Rhodey’s outstretched arms and buried his head in the man’s chest. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make him mad.”

“You have nothing to be sorry about,” said Rhodey, rubbing gentle circles into Tony’s back. “Come on, Clint. Let’s go. You guys on the other hand,” he said, giving Steve and Tony very pointed looks. “Whatever’s going on between you two, you need to figure this out.”

“Yes, mom,” Tony said with a level of sass a teenager would envy.

Rhodey glared at Tony. He walked up to Tony until their faces were only inches apart. “Don’t give me no lip, Tones,” he said in a curt voice. “It’s one thing for you guys to fight in private or on a mission. It’s something else to fight in front of a kid. You of all people should know that.”

Tony tried to come up with an excuse, but Rhodey didn’t wait around for an answer. Kid in hand and Clint following closely behind, Rhodey stormed away to the register, leaving a very awkward silence between Steve and Tony.

Tony was the first to break the silence. “God, I hate it when he’s right.”

“Maybe you should be dating him instead of me,” Steve said, the beginnings of a smile flickering in the corners of his mouth.

“Nah. Rhodes is like a brother. It’d just be weird dating my brother,” said Tony as he scuffed the bottom his shoe on the ground. “Besides, if the kid is any indication, I’m too far gone on you to be interested in anyone else.”

“Is that what’s wrong?” asked Steve. “I noticed you’ve been acting weird since he woke up and started talking about Captain America. Does all this have to do with the kid’s interest in me?”

Tony chuckled. “I’d call it an obsession more than an ‘interest’ if I’m being perfectly honest.”

“Oh Tony.”

“It’s just… I don’t know how to describe it,” Tony sputtered. “I know logically he’s a younger version of me and none of what he’s doing has any dramatic consequence on my life, but it’s so embarrassing. It’s like remembering the super fan boy version of myself from ages ago, only it’s not a memory. It’s real and everyone around me is encouraging his shitty fan boy behavior. Doing stupid things. Telling embarrassing stories. Talking your ear off because he’s so excited that his greatest hero, Captain America, is taking the time to listen to him.

Steve looked down as his cheeks flushed a light pink. “He’s really not that bad.”

Tony laughed. “You don’t know bad, Steve. My room was almost a literal temple dedicated to you. The only reason it wasn’t was because there was a corner of my room dedicated to robotics because my dad wouldn’t let me keep all my tools and stuff in his lab. Said it cluttered the place up.

“And here you are, eating up every one of his tricks for attention and it’s just so… Arg! I can’t stand it. I’m so much better than that. And eventually you’re going to get annoyed and hate him and then hate me and then-”

“Tony, it’s okay,” Steve said, taking Tony’s hand in his. “He may be a little chatty, but it’s fine.”

“He’s an embarrassment.”

“He’s you,” Steve said with a smile so pure and wonderful it almost made Tony forget how humiliating his younger self was. “He’s the part of you that wears his heart on his sleeve. He enjoys being loud and proud about who and what he loves. Every second of the day, he’s showing the world just how much he cares.”

“And what exactly is that supposed to mean?” asked Tony. “Are you saying you want me to act like that for the rest of our lives? Sorry to crush your dreams Cap, but that’s no happening.”

Steve shook his head, but the smile remained on his lips. “What I’m trying to say is, I love every part of you. Even your crazy early fanboy days. You don’t have to worry about him doing or saying something that embarrasses you. It’s not going to make me stop loving you.”

Tony could barely believe his ears “Really? Even after all crazy stuff he said.”

“Really. What type of boyfriend would I be if I didn’t accept every part of you. Past, present, or future.”

“A pretty shitty one.”

“And I’m trying very hard not to be one anymore,” Steve said with a smile. He pressed a quick kiss to Tony’s lips and wrapped his arms around Tony’s waist. “Of course, that doesn’t mean I won’t bring this up once every once in a while.”

Oh god. “You wouldn’t.”

“I would. And at the most inopportune time,” said Steve with a devilish smile.

Tony groaned. “I hate you so much.”

Steve just laid a quick peck on Tony’s forehead. “I love you too, Tony.”

“Um… are you guys done arguing?” asked a small voice.

Steve pulled away from Tony until their fingers barely touched. “Just about. You can come out if you like.”

Young Tony peaked out from behind a rack of heavy coats. He walked toward the two men, hands behind his back as if preparing himself for the emotional backlash.

Steve gave Tony a quick nudge in the back and shot him a pointed look that said, ‘Apologize.’

‘I don’t want to,’ Tony said with a roll of his eyes.

Steve cocked his head toward the kid. More insistent this time.

Tony let out a heavy sigh. He knelt down to the ground so he and his past self could look each other in the eye. “Look, kid," he said. "I’m sorry I yelled. I’m not mad at you. It’s just ... It's one thing to remember how I acted in the past and another to see it in person. Seeing you repeat my mistakes in front of my friends, mistakes that I've learned from, it's embarrassing. But I never should have taken my feeling out on you. So, sorry. I haven't been acting right and that's my fault. Not yours.”

The kid twisted his body back and forth with nervous anxiety. “You sure you’re not mad at me?”

Tony nodded. “Positive. I know we get yelled at for a lot of things in life, but this shouldn’t be one of them. You shouldn't be punished for loving something. Or, someone.”

The kid looked down at his feet. “I know you wanted me to put it back, but Rhodey got me the Captain America doll because I liked it so much. Is that okay?”

“This is going to haunt me for the rest of my life,” Tony muttered to himself. “Sure. Why not if it makes you happy. Not like I can tell Rhodey what to do with his money.”

A smile broke across the kid’s face faster than you could say ‘America’. He looked like a kid who had just landed feet first in the best candy shop in the world. “Did you hear that, Steve? I can keep him!” he yelled, running straight into Steve’s arms.

“I heard,” Steve said, picking up the small bundle of joy. He looked at Tony and mouthed a silent, “Thank you.”

Tony tried to shrug it off, but he couldn’t hide the smile on his lips. Steve was really good with the kid even if it was a little awkward seeing his younger self worship the very ground Steve walked upon. It was… nice? Seeing Steve accept Tony despite everything. It gave Tony hope for the future. That, for the first time in his life, he might not fuck up a relationship that meant the world to him. That maybe, one day, if he was super good, his dream could come true. The dream that Tony could finally be Steve’s…

* * *

 

“Well, I think that’s enough excitement for one day,” Steve said as he put the kid down for bed. Steve had picked one of the guest rooms closest to his quarters. The light gray walls made the room a little impersonal, but having the bags of clothes in the corner and Tony all snug in his bed, holding the Captain America plush in the crook of his arm made it less so. It wasn’t much, but it felt lived in. It felt like this room belonged to him. This was Tony’s.

“Tomorrow,” said Steve as he pulled the blankets up to Tony’s chin, “we will find a way to send you back home. You’ll see. Adult you is really smart.”

Tony wiggled down between the sheets, holding his new doll close to his chest. “That’s okay,” he said. “Big me can take as long as he likes. I like living here. It’s different, but much better.”

Steve’s smile faltered. “I know we had a lot of fun today, but don’t you miss home?” He knew Tony didn’t have the best childhood, but could it really be so bad that he didn’t want to return?

Tony shook his head. “No. Not really?”

“But isn’t there anyone you miss? What about Jarvis?”

“I have you,” Tony said with a grin. He let out a big yawn as he sank into the covers. “That’s all I need.”

Steve’s stomach sank. He wanted to shake Tony and tell him it wasn’t true. There were other people in his life just as important as Steve. Maybe it would take a few years, but he’d find them eventually. He’d find people who cared about him, appreciated him, saw genius and heart despite the cocky front he put on. People that loved him. People that missed him. People that Steve was keeping Tony from meeting if they didn’t get him back soon.

There was a gentle tug on Steve’s sleeve. “Steve, will you tell me a story?” asked Tony. “Mommy always tells me a story before bed.”

“Sure,” Steve said with a smile. Anything to get his mind off getting the boy home. “I’m sure Tony has a few age appropriate books somewhere.”

“No, I don’t want some kid’s book,” Tony said kicking under the blankets. “I want a war story.”

Steve paused. “A war story?” he asked, not quite sure if he heard the request correctly.

“Uh huh,” Tony nodded. “I wanna hear about what you did during the war. The comic dad keeps in his office says you did some really neat things, but he also says they’re just an exaguration and I shouldn’t fill my mind with such nonsense.”

“You mean exaggeration,” Steve corrected.

“That’s what I said, exadurashion,” Tony nodded, confident in his pronunciation.

Steve tried really hard not to laugh, but a smile, a smile was an acceptable reaction to a six-year-old trying to use a new word. “Okay,” he said, finally giving in. “But I don’t think any of them are appropriate for kids, so I might have to change a few things.”

“I’ll be fine. I’m very mature for my age. Jarvis says so,” Tony said with a confident grin.

“Oh, well, if Jarvis says so.” Steve fluffed up a few pillows for extra support sat down at the end of the bed so Tony had plenty of room to stretch out. “Like most good stories, this one starts in Paris…”

* * *

 

A few hours later, a gentle knock on the door woke Steve from his light slumber.

“Hey,” Tony whispered as he tiptoed into the room. “Mini me finally go to sleep?”

“Yeah,” Steve said, rubbing his eyes. “Took forever. Went through three war stories before I told him enough was enough. Hoped he’d fall asleep on his own if I closed the door and left him alone, but he said he wanted company.”

Tony chuckled. “Yup, that sounds about right. I remember hating bedtime as a kid. Always tried asking for one more story no matter how much I was yawning. And for the record, I can totally fall asleep on my own at this age.”

“I thought so, but he just looked so sad. I couldn’t just leave him alone,” Steve said, running a hand through the kid’s soft hair.

Tony rolled his eyes. He took a seat at the edge of the bed and whispered into Steve’s ear. “You spoil him too much.”

“I think you mean just enough,” Steve said, pressing a quick peck to Tony’s cheek. God, he wanted more. But now was not the time or place. “Figure out the machine yet?”

Tony let out a heavy sigh. “No, not yet. I’ve got FRIDAY running some numbers in the background, but it’s going to take a while. It’s been ages since I’ve been kidnapped and I’m still a bit shaken up. Plus, great science can’t be done all in one night.”

“So you’ve told me many times,” Steve chuckled.

“In the meantime,” said Tony, inching closer to Steve. “I was thinking I could get you to tell me a story of my own while we wait. Preferably a sexy one?”

Blood rush to Steve’s cheeks. “Tony,” Steve hissed, covering his boyfriend’s mouth. “Not now. Kid just went to sleep. What if he hears you?’

Tony grinned as he pushed Steve’s hand away. “Well, he’s going to hear it soon anyway. What’s the harm in starting early? ‘Tony, you’re so tight,’” Tony quietly moaned as he walked his fingers up Steve’s chest. “‘I love how your tight ass squeezes my dick.’ ‘Feels so good ramming my cock into your hole.’ ‘I’m going to fill you full of come you dirty slut.’ And don’t forget my favorite, ‘Sit that slutty ass on my lap and fuck yourself on my cock. I want to see your dick bouncing up and down as you take it like the hungry bitch you are.”

Steve slammed his lips against Tony’s. “My room,” he growled.  “Now.”

* * *

 

The late winter sun peeked over the horizon and into Steve’s room. It washed over his nose, then his eyes before Steve had enough. He let out a heavy sigh as he stretched out his sex sore muscles. The welcomed ache in his hips and back were much better than they were the night before. Shame he would be back to peak health in a few hours. Steve rolled over to the center of the bed so when he opened his eyes, the first thing he saw was Tony. He smiled, drinking in every detail of Tony’s sleeping face as the world welcomed them to a new day.

Tony was sleeping peacefully on his side. His right cheek mashed into the pillow. A few stray strands, mostly brown but a few going gray, draped across his eyes like a curtain. Slim fingers were tucked under Tony’s chin as if he was holding something precious to his heart. His naturally tanned chest moved up and down with each breath he took, giving life to a maze of scars that should have killed him long ago. Tony’s mouth, open ever so slightly as breath after life giving breath passed between his lips.

Steve’s heart skipped a beat as a lovesick grin spread across his face. Goddamn, Tony was beautiful. How had Steve gotten so lucky?

A particularly heavy breath left Tony’s lips and grazed Steve’s fingers. It tickled his fingers like a feather. Slowly, a hot need began to stir under his skin. Steve’s cock twitched as he thought about all the things he could press between those perfectly parted lips. Fingers, lips, tongue, cock. Well, that last one might be a bit dangerous. Tony would need to be up first.

… Tony did say he was always up for a morning blowjob.

Steve ran his fingers down past Tony’s lips and across his skin. He traced an invisible line down Tony’s body, through the sparse chest hair, down past his soft stomach, stopping only when Steve’s hand grazed Tony’s flaccid cock. Well-groomed pubic hair brushed against his fingers as Steve blindly made his way down to the root.

But just as Steve was about to take Tony’s cock in hand and rub him awake, a sharp, insistent knock came from the other side of his door.

“Steve? Steve! It’s time to get up.”

Steve groaned. Well, there went _that_ boner. He dropped his head on the pillow and tried not to be disappointed.

There was another knock. More insistent this time. “Steve? Steve! Wake up Steve! Computer Jarvis says you’re in there. Steve? STEEEVE!”

“Oh my god. What’s mini me doing up this early?” groaned Tony. He tried to wriggle closer to Steve. His once relaxed eyes were squeezed shut as Tony tried hold onto the last remains of a lazy morning.

Steve chuckled. “Should I ask him? I think I’m a little too naked at the moment.”

“Noooo,” whined Tony. “You should stay here. In bed. With me. Where it’s warm.”

“Steeeeeeve!” Tiny Tony was using both hands now to batter the door. “Wake up!”

Steve let out a heavy sigh. “I should at least check to make sure he’s okay. Care to join me?”

“God no,” said Tony. “Bed is warm and it’s too early to get up. Besides, the last thing mini me needs is detailed knowledge about how he’s fucking his childhood icon.”

“I highly doubt he’ll figure that out,” Steve said as he slipped into a pair of briefs.

“Maybe,” said Tony, propping himself up just enough to watch Steve get dressed. “But is it worth the risk? I was a very sensitive, smart kid, remember? It doesn’t take much to figure out we’re fucking.”

Steve rolled his eyes. “You give yourself too much credit.”

“I don’t know. I’d like to think I give myself just enough,” Tony purred.

Steve just shook his head at his ridiculous boyfriend. “That’s high praise from someone who said they could make me come without using their hands,” he said, slipping a shirt over his head.”

“Well, I managed it, didn’t I?” Tony said with a confident smile. The same smile that made Steve lose control of himself the night before and come all over Tony’s face.

Steve’s face flushed bright red. “Shut up,” he said, trying to hide his embarrassment. “Come down for breakfast when you’ve decided to be a mature adult.”

“Maybe in a few hours. I’m too tired to adult,” Tony said with a loud yawn before rolling over.

Steve watched Tony retreat back under the covers and let out a heavy sigh. Guess he was on his own for this one.

Steve opened the door just enough to peek his head out into the hallway without revealing his bedridden companion. “Hey kiddo. What you doing up?” he asked the very awake child.

“It’s Saturday,” said Tony as he bounced up and down on the balls of his feet. “Jarvis makes me pancakes on Saturday. Well, he did. But the computer says he’s dead. And he’s a computer now! So, since he’s not around, you should make me pancakes.”

“I should huh?” said Steve, smiling at the younger’s moxie.

“Uh huh. I’m sure you make the best pancakes.”

From deep beneath the covers, Tony groaned.

“Is someone else in there?” asked the kid. He craned his head trying to get a look at what was hidden behind Steve’s legs. “Do I know them? Who is it? Is it me? Are you having a sleepover with me? No fair! I wanna have a sleepover with Steve.”

“Trust me kid,” Tony muttered from under the covers. His voice low enough that only Steve’s super hearing could pick up. “You’ll have plenty of those, but you won’t get much sleep.”

Steve’s cheeks burned as hot as their sex last night. “Let’s forget about that. How about I make you those pancakes like you asked?” he said, quickly ushering the kid away from his room and away from a very naked Tony.

“Yay! Pancake party!” He skipped down the hallway, holding Steve’s hand all the way to the elevator.  

As Steve called the elevator, Tony tugged on his arm. “Why is big me in your bed? Does he have problems sleeping too?”

Well, that was one way of looking at it. “I’ll… um… tell you when you’re older,” he said, trying to hide the flush creeping up his neck.

Tony groaned “No fair. I wanna know now.”

“Whiners don’t get red, white, and blue pancakes from Captain America,” Steve said, praying the bribe would get Tony’s mind off the very adult situation.

Tony gasped and covered his mouth. “I’ll be good. I promise.”

Guess it worked.

* * *

 

About three fourths of the team was already gathered in the kitchen in various stages of dress and alertness. Vision was making an omelet with lots of spices which he was definitely not going to eat. A spoon surrounded by a red aura stirred lazy circles in the air as Wanda stared into the swirling nothingness of her very black coffee. Bruce was asleep on the couch. A shadow of stubble dotted his jaw and the morning paper was spread across his lap like a blanket. Both Bucky and Natasha were hunched over some sort of Russian gruel.

And Clint, well, Clint was drinking his coffee straight from the pot.

“Good morning!” said Tony with enough chipper to give sparrows a run for their money.

“Good morning, young sir,” said Vision with an easy smile. Clearly the only one awake. “Come down for breakfast, I see. Can I help you find anything?”

“No thank you,” said Tony as he struggled to pull himself up on one of the bar stools. “Steve is going to make me pancakes.”

“He is?”

“Yup” Tony said, swinging his legs back and forth in the air. “Honestly, I’m surprised he can cook. Uncle Obie says, only women need to know how to cook.

“Your Uncle Obie is a sexist pig,” grumbled Natasha.

“Spoiler alert, Natasha. He’s not supposed to know that yet,” said Clint.

“That’s okay,” said Tony, unperturbed the adult’s comments. “It’s what Aunt Peggy said too after she hit him on the head with a frying pan. She and Uncle Obie aren’t allowed in the house at the same time anymore.”

Steve chuckled as he cracked some eggs into a bowl. Good old Peg.

“Anyway, I don’t think Uncle Obie is right. Jarvis cooks for me all the time and he’s not a woman.”

“See,” said Steve, placing a fork and knife down in front of Tony. “Adults can be wrong about some things. It’s important to remember that and think for yourself.”

“I know that. Daddy tells me to think critically all the time,” said Tony. He picked up the fork and knife and gently tapped them against each other as if they were dolls. “Hey, Steve?” asked Tony as he waved the fork and knife back and forth in the air.

“Yes?” said Steve, busily whisking all the ingredients together.

“Why did Uncle Obie mean when he said if Jarvis was a woman, he’d make a good wife?”

Steve staggered and almost dropped pancake batter on the floor. “Um… Well, to put it nicely, he means that Jarvis has qualities that would make an ideal female spouse.”

“Oh.”

“But don’t got around telling people that, okay?”

“Why not?” asked Tony.

“It’s rude.”

“Why?”

“Because Jarvis is a man, not a woman,” said Steve as he poured a bit of batter into a hot pan. “Just because a man has feminine like qualities, doesn’t mean it’s okay to go around comparing him to a woman. It’s okay for men to do things like cook and clean just like it’s okay for a woman to fight or shoot a gun.”

“Oh, I already know that,” said Tony. “Aunt Peggy works with guns all the time and she’s really good with them.”

“There you go. You already have a good example,” Steve said, flipping a pancake up into the air with a flick of his wrist.

Tony was silent a few more minutes as he watched Steve turn out two more perfectly golden pancakes. “Steve, can a man be a wife?” Tony asked as Steve poured the last of the batter into the pan.

“No, Tony. A man can be a husband, but he can’t be a wife,” Steve said, absentmindedly as he began washing the now empty bowl.

Tony’s brow furrowed in confusion. “But what if a man _wants_ to be a wife.”

Steve’s brain stuttered to a stop. “That’s … a little more complicated,” Steve said, trying to be as delicate as possible. He had only recently learned about all the new words to describe sexuality. Things like gender identity and gender expression were still new to him.

“No, it’s not,” Tony said, pounding on the table with both his fists. “Wife is a job, right? Just like ‘mommy’ or ‘daddy’. But it’s only boys that can be daddies and only girls that can be mommies. Why can’t a boy be a mommy?”

“I’m sorry, but I believe I’m failing to understand this line of logic,” interrupted Vision.

“Don’t worry, I’m on the same page,” said Wanda.

Tony rolled his eyes. “It’s really simple. Adults are always saying I can be anything I want. Well, since I can’t be Captain America, I’ll just have to be your wife when I grow up.”

Steve’s heart skipped a beat. His cheeks turned hot as all other eyes in the room turned their attention to the naive child.

“Tony, honey, that’s not exactly how this works,” Natasha said, placing a gentle hand on his arm.

“I don’t care,” Tony said. He knocked Natasha’s hand away and stood up on his seat so he could look Steve straight in the eyes.  “I know I’m not a woman, but I’d take good care of you. Dad says the company will be mine someday and when it does, I can marry you. I’d be rich and you wouldn’t have to do anything except be my husband.”

Steve looked at Tony. This smaller, younger version of his boyfriend saying words that Steve had only dreamt of hearing. And here Steve was, having to let him down gently instead of saying ‘yes’ like he wanted. “Tony, that’s sweet of you. But you can’t be my wife.”

Hope drained from Tony’s eyes. “Why not?” he whined. “Is it because two men can’t get married? Is it because I’m too young?”

“That’s not… There’s just some things married couples do that you’re not old enough to understand.”

“You mean kiss?” asked Tony with a completely straight face. “You and big me already argue all the time like mom and dad. All we have to do is kiss like Jarvis and Mrs. Jarvis and we’ll be married.”

Steve let out a frustrated groan. “Marriage is more complicated than that. And you have to be at least eighteen in the state of New York before you can get married.” Not to mention the age difference. This Tony was cute, but he wasn’t Steve’s Tony.

This wasn’t the man Steve went to war with. This wasn’t the man who fought by his side and fought against Steve’s every order. They hadn’t shared burgers at a dive bar or gotten trapped in Little Italy during a rainstorm. This wasn’t the same Tony that made fun of him for mixing up Star Wars and Star Trek and then proceeded to sit down with and educate Steve on the top twenty most influential science fiction movies to date. This wasn’t the man Steve had grown to love over the past few years. This wasn’t the man Steve wanted to marry. Not yet.

“Hurry up and eat your breakfast,” he said, pushing a plate toward Tony. “We can talk about this more after you finish eating.”

Tony frown. “Okay,” he said with a dejected sigh. He looked down at his pancakes and his mood went from bad to worse. “What? Strawberries? I hate strawberries. They look weird and they have too many seeds.”

Huh. That was interesting. Adult Tony liked strawberries, but the kid version didn’t. Maybe he learned to like it later in life. “In that case, just eat one. Never know unless you try it,” Steve said, putting the few remaining dishes in the sink to be washed later.

“Whyyyy?” whined Tony. “I don’t need to try them. I already told you I don’t like them.”

“Captain America likes strawberries,” said Natasha. She plucked a strawberry off the top a popped it right into her mouth. “Don’t you, Steve?”

Steve shrugged. “Sure. Tony would argue that the ones in California are sweeter, but Natasha, don’t force him to…”

Natasha hushed his with a pointed look. “See. Captain America eats his strawberries. You should have some too.”

“But…”

“You want to grow up and marry Captain America, right? You gotta impress him,” said Bucky, placing his metal arm around Tony’s shoulders. “Eat your damn fruit.”

Tony glared at the stack of pancakes. He picked up a glistening strawberry with the tips of his fingers. Tony turned it around, examining the surface for any imperfections or any excuse not to eat the foul thing. Unfortunately, Steve had selected only the best fruit leaving Tony only one option, eat the damn thing.

Tony squeezed his eyes shut and shoved the fruit into his mouth in one go. His faces soured as he ate the strawberry, grimacing with each crunch.

“Oh my goodness. I can’t believe that worked,” Wanda whispered to Vision.

“What can I say,” said Bucky, smug face beaming with pride. “Captain America is an influential man.”

After a few more bites, Tony swallowed. His face was ripe with disgust. He turned to Steve, begging for some sympathy. “Will you marry me now?”

Steve quickly took away the plate and scrapped every trace of strawberry off the pancakes. “How about this, I’ll just take them off and eat them later. You know, something a _real_ adult should do,” Steve said, making a point to glare at the adult onlookers.

“Does that mean you’re going to let him skip on his vegetables too?” asked Clint. “Shouldn’t do that. Kids need their nutrients and that’s a steep hill you’re climbing, Steve.”

“I wouldn’t have to if you guys stopped bullying him.”

“But he proposed to you!” said Bucky. “How can we not have a little fun after something like that?”

Steve glared at Bucky and Clint “This all stops, now. And you tell Tony any of this, I will personally make your life a living hell.”

Clint groaned. “Fine.” He threw his hands up into the air and walked out of the kitchen. “Way to ruin our fun Captain kill joy.”

Steve turned his gaze to Natasha, Wanda, and Vision. “And how about the rest of you?”

Silent looks passed between the other Avengers. Without another word, Vision and Wanda picked up their things and moved to the living room. Natasha was the only one brave enough to stay.

Down the hallway, the elevator pinged. Tony walked into the kitchen, announcing his presence with a loud yawn as his bare feet padded across the floor. His hair was plastered flat on one side and a floppy mess on the other. Brown and grey stubble decorated Tony’s jaw and neck all the way down to the purple hickey barely hidden underneath a loose fitting white shirt. Tony stretched his arms over head, revealing a bit of beautiful skin above the waistband of his sweatpants.

He didn’t look the least bit attractive, yet Steve’s hands turned clammy as he took in the sight of his boyfriend. His heart beat loudly in his chest and his lips suddenly felt dry. That confession must have done something to him, because Steve felt like he was falling in love all over again. “Good morning Tony.”

“Morning Steve,” Tony muttered.

“Morning big me!” Tony said as he dug into the now clean pancakes.

“Hey mini me. You sleep okay?” asked Tony.

Tony nodded. “Yup yup. What about you? You’re walking a little funny. Did you trip on something?”

Tony hummed. “Must have pulled something in my sleep.”

Clint lurched, almost choking on his coffee. “Oh my god.”

“What?” asked the kid.

“Barton is acting like a child,” Steve said, turning on the coffee machine. “Don’t worry yourself about it.”.

The kid nodded, but he clearly didn’t buy Steve’s lie. “Were you sleep walking? Do we sleep walk when we get older?”

There was a mischievous twinkle in Tony’s eyes as his lips curled up into a peculiar smile. “Kid, a lot of things happen when we get older. A few of them being everything hurts and our lack of stamina makes it harder to keep our energy up. Epically during vigorous exercise.”

In the living room, Clint covered his eyes and screamed, “Are you kidding me!”

“Boo! Get a room!” echoed Bucky.

“Shut up you two. This is a conversation only for adults,” Tony yelled back.

The kid looked at Tony. Then Steve. Then back at Tony. “What aren’t you telling me? Is it one of those things you’ll tell me when I get older?”

Tony shrugged. “Well, you’re me, so how’s this, you’ll figure it out when you get older.”

“Ugh,” groaned the kid. “That’s even worse!”

Steve let out a heavy sigh as he watched the two Tonys bicker. How was this his life? After everything he’d been through, how was it possible as heartwarming and ridiculous as this?

“Settle down you two. Tony, hurry up and eat your pancakes,” Steve said, putting down a perfect cup of coffee in front of _his_ Tony.

“Okay, but he started it,” Tony glowered, shoving another piece into his mouth.

“Ugh, coffee. My first love,” Tony groaned. He grabbed the mug with both hands and gulped down the contents like a man tasting water for the first time.

“Gee, thanks, Tony,” Steve said with a sarcastic smile. “Glad to know I rank lower than coffee.”

“Aw, don’t be jealous. Love you too babe,” Tony said. He gave Steve’s hand a quick squeeze before planning a kiss on his cheek.

A metal fork dropped to the floor. “Aaaaaaaaaahhhhh!”

Steve immediately went into attack mode. “What? What is it?” he asked, his eyes darted around the room for anything dangerous.

“I’m married to Captain America!” Tony screamed.

Adult Tony looked very confused. “I’m sorry, what?”

“Did you see it?” asked the kid, incessantly tugging on Natasha’s sleeve. “I kissed him. That means I married Captain America!”

Tony groaned into his coffee mug. “It’s a little more complicated than that kid.”

“You’re just jealous,” sneered the kid.

“I… What?” squeaked a scandalized Tony. “How in the world would _I_ be jealous?”

“Because I’m Steve’s favorite and you aren’t,” the kid said with a smug smile.

Tony just shook his head. “That doesn’t even make sense. We’re the same person.”

“Doesn’t matter. I’m Captain America’s wife. That’s good enough for me,” sang Tony.

“Kid…” Tony growled.

Tony reached for some loose fabric of the nightshirt. But the kid was fast. He dodged out of Tony’s reach and in less than a second, the kid had pushed himself up on the counter. He crawled across the counter until he was face to face with Steve. The kid grabbed Steve’s face with both hands and placed a syrupy, wet kiss on Steve’s lips.

“Oh no, he didn’t,” whispered Bucky.

Steve could barely make a sound. He couldn’t even push the small boy off the counter. Steve was just too surprised by Tony’s bold move to say or do anything.

When Tony pulled away, he was all smiles. “Now I’m married to Captain America too,” he giggled with innocent joy.

“That’s it! Come here!”

“Nooooo!”

Tony reached up and grabbed the back of the kid’s shirt. The kid landed in Tony’s lap, and that’s when things started to go haywire.

The ground under the building began to shake. Hanging fixtures swung back and forth like leaves in the wind. Lights flickered on and off. Dishes rattled. Drinking glasses of all shapes and sizes fell off the shelves and crashed on the ground.

Both Tony’s sat in their chair, completely still. Their eyes had turned white and glowed like flashlights in a dark room. Cracks appeared on the child’s skin like a China doll being broken from the inside out. Light spilled through his flesh as the deafening noise of time and space collapsing filled the room.

“Tony!” Steve tried to grab his boyfriend, but a sudden blast of energy sent him flying back.

“Of all the dumb ways to die, I never expected it would be due to a paradox,” Bucky yelled over the din.

The ceiling in the living room cracked. Dust and bits of insulation rained down on their heads. Furniture jumped up and down with each wave of energy. Something large shattered in the kitchen as the entire facility was engulfed in a blinding flash.

* * *

 

When Steve opened his eyes, everything looked normal. No broken glass. No cracked ceiling. No damage. Just the Avengers hanging out in the living room and Tony sprawled out on the floor like a dead body.

Steve’s blood suddenly turned cold. “Tony!” Steve rushed over to Tony’s side. He ran a hand over Tony’s cheek. Nothing. Two fingers on Tony’s wrist. Pulse, still there. Thank god.

Tony groaned. “What happened?”

“You caused the end of the world!”

“Shut up, Clint!”

“Everything’s fine. What is the last thing you remember?” Steve asked as he helped push Tony up into a sitting position.

Tony squinted as he rubbed his head. “I … remember being jealous and mad. Why was I mad? Something inappropriate and embarassing …”

Steve’s heart stopped. He looked at the empty spot in Tony’s lap. “The kid.” Steve scanned the room. “Where is he? Has anyone seen him?”

Steve’s friend looked around the living room. “I don’t see him,” said Wanda.

“Scanners are not detecting any extra lifeforms in the building,” said Vision.

“Everyone, start looking!” barked Steve. “He’s got to be around here somewhere.”

“Steve,” Tony said, squeezing his hand. “Honey, I think it’s okay.”

“How can you say that?” asked Steve.

“Because,” Tony said in a calm voice. “I remember waking up in my toy room sad that everything that’s happened in the last twenty-four hours was just a dream.”

Hope swelled in Steve’s chest. “So, he’s-”

Tony smiled. “Yeah, he’s okay. We’re both okay.”

A wave of relief washed over Steve. “Thank goodness,” he said, barely able to contain tears from running down his face. He held Tony’s face between his hands, not wanting to look away even for a second. “I was afraid I lost you both.”

Tony blushed. He kissed a tear off Steve’s face. “Universe is going to have to try a lot harder to kill me.”

Steve snorted. He buried his head in Tony’s chest and tried not to show how worried he truly was. End of the word. Only Tony could casually joke about something like that.

“Well,” said Bruce running a hand through his hair. “I guess that solves our problem about how to get Tony back to the past.”

“Bit too easy if you ask me,” said Bucky

“I’m not surprised,” said Vision. “FRIDAY showed me the equations AIM used for the time machine. AIM’s process of pulling Tony into the present, it seemed as if one thing went wrong, the entire thing would collapse in on itself.”

“Or this case, stretch and bounce back like a rubber band,” said Natasha.

“It’s a shame,” said Wanda. “I wanted to teach him a few traditional games my brother and I played when we were children. I think Tony would have liked that.”

Steve groaned rumbled around Tony’s chest. “Can you guys please go somewhere else? Trying to have a moment here.”

Tony tapped his shoulder. “Hey, Steve?”

Steve looked up.

“Am I still too young to marry you now?” Tony asked with a devious waggle of his eyebrows.

“Shut up, you big idiot,” Steve said, pushing that stupid look out of his sight. “I’m being emotional and you’re just stilling here cracking jokes. What kind of boyfriend are you?”

Tony grinned and pressed a kiss to Steve’s lips. “The best kind,” he said. “I love you too, sweetie.”


End file.
